Upon the Solid Rock... I stagger

For almost eight months now, I've been dabbling with the definition of adulthood: God has set me on the unique path of living at home while attending community college. While my parents and I level-headily made the decision for economic and financial reasons, it was not where I had pictured myself. Since embarking on this teeter-totter experience of balancing teenage to adult responsibilities and characteristics, I've picked up bits and pieces of the woman I want to become.

I intend for this blog to be a list of some sort- A personal means of conviction as I experiment with new goals in the world, but not of it. I'll post weekly assignments/ experiments, journal-like entries, bible studies, prayers, letters to God, etc.

A mixture of role models, spiritual stirrings, and personal time with God have led me here-

Through blogging, I hope to achieve, or at least provoke growth in the following areas:

-Independent thought

-Communication.... To write my thoughts as they come, as opposed to letting them wander through my head, serving no concrete purpose. I want to be well-spoken, and learn to share my passions with tact, in writing AND oral communication.

-Accomplishment: I've always had difficulty with finishing anything, but this project carries with it a sense of conviction, and endless opportunities for things to explore.

-Writing practice/increased knowledge and use of vocabulary

-Biblical foundations/strengthened relationship with God- Learning where my struggles connect with Jesus' & God's teachings, and how I can pull meaning/compare events from my life and the bible.

-A diary-like memoir of my college years, to look back and reflect on.

The title of this post has special significance: Lately, I've felt unsatisfied with my balance of life--

It's common knowledge that life cannot by any means be perfect, no matter how hard one tries, and I accept this as a means for God to work through flaws for His glory, however....

I've lacked a sense of self-worth, first letting seemingly insignificant things like laundry, organizing my school binder, cleaning my bathroom, etc. become last priority for a week or two. While being student and store clerk are my dominant roles, I've allowed them to justify laziness, affecting my home, my family, and my quality of life.

So, another goal I'd like to reach is a renewed sense of self worth and respect for the blessings God has given me: He has been exceedingly gracious to provide me with so much, that a self-derived feeling of apathy is a strong sign of disrespect. By wanting to make my home life, my work life, and school lively, upbeat, and staying attentive for God's leadings, I will understand how every thoughtful step in the right direction is a service of faith for His kingdom.

Throughout the bible, we are instructed to honor- Our fathers and mothers, our physical bodies, our friends, the Lord with our time. While He is my solid rock and firm foundation, I know I am human. I falter upon the concrete plans He has for me, afraid and insecure. In light of this, I desire strength and peace; to rely upon His grounding as I live out my intentions, being a doer of the word.

I deserve better than sinking sand. Therefore I take up your daily offer, God- To know and love you daily with the renewing of my mind. : )

Here's to a new week of loving you.............